Are you looking for flamenco artwork?
My boyfriend pays more attention to blonde girls...but I'm brunette? i feel so ugly :(?For the past few days it has been extremely obvious...we were in an arcade and we were walking and I notice he isn't next to me...but staring at some natural blonde chick's (not trashy) clevage...and he tells me about it and I wait and he starts just staring at her hair and everything...he did this for a few minutes and well, I felt really bad. I have light golden auburn hair and b cup breast. He is teaching and I went to sit in on his first class (he invited me) and we were walking early and he saw some blonde chick and asked where the class was and was like, "you were in my class last semester" and started talking to her for around 20 minutes and even if I talked in the conversation he wouldn't take his eyes off her and ignored me and (jokingly) made fun of me. He remembered her name and seemed enchanted by her. when a pretty blonde girl walks by he always says something like, "you're pretty" to me in an (unsure) voice or something. He never does that with brunettes and I have asked him if he prefered blondes and he says, "no" but I have caught him saying, "I love blonde hair!" :( Before I met my boyfriend I used to be a bleached blonde (and looked great/natural) but after a salon messed up my hair I went back to brunette. For the past couple days I can't stop putting hydrogen peroxide in my hair :( I know if I were blonde he would pay attention to me...I sent him an ecard just to say, "I love you." and he didn't even remember it or mention it to me until I brought it up. He doesn't even pay attention to me and I have to repeat everything. Just the other day he wouldn't let me help him move some boxes and had me stand outside in the cold and his friend offered me his jacket to wear because I was freaking shivering...and my boyfriend later got mad at me for wearing his friend's coat! I was like, "You didn't even notice that I was cold. He noticed and helped me out." I know my boyfriend loves me and he'll buy me lunch and what not, but when we started dating he ruined my self-esteem by mentioning my breast not being big enough, my clothing not being new enough, my hair being sloppy and not straight, and even being "too thin"(I'm not). He points out my acne and stares at it and then says, "I didn't SAY anything." and now I can't even feel good about my hair. I always question why he asked me out if he didn't find me physically attractive. I have had younger, more mature, well educated, very wealthy men who I am sure DID find me physically attractive the way I was, going after me...Sometimes I wonder why I am trying to live up to the fantasy of my boyfriend...I love him, but he is definetely not high class. I look good as a blonde...Should I go dirty blonde? I just feel so hideous. My boyfriend says I am pretty, but he's an open book and I know he adores blondes...I want him to pay attention to me that same way. I feel so stupid...he never compliments my artwork or guitar skills (flamenco, classical, jazz), and barely said a thing about my cooking.... anyways...yes, I have low self esteem...but should I go blonde if it boost my self-esteem and makes my boyfriend pay better attention to me? Sorry for the length of this question...you don't have to read all of the details. Thanks :)
